advice | Julia Kristina Counselling

Why Getting Unsolicited Advice Often Feels Icky.

By Julia Kristina|2017-05-21T16:05:43-07:00June 28th, 2016|General|

Have you ever wondered why it is that most of us think other people want, no NEED our advice and should absolutely do what we say and make the choices we can clearly see are best from them - but then when the tables are turned and they come to us and tell us what to do, or how we should live our lives or what choices WE must make, we get irritated, resistant, frustrated and feel like they "really don't know what they are talking about"? So we all want to give our golden, must-be-revered [...]

It’s More Important to Listen than to Give Advice.

By Julia Kristina|2017-05-21T16:05:52-07:00January 15th, 2015|General|

When is the best time to give advice? And the answer is… never. And by never, I mean not ever. Unless, of course, we specifically ask the person if they are looking for our thoughts or suggestions regarding their troublesome situation, AND they reply “yes!” or they explicitly request our advice (but even then the person rarely actually wants your advice – they just want you to fix their problem for them which, of course, none of us can actually do). You see, many of us believe in earnest that we are the experts on [...]