vulnerability | Julia Kristina Counselling

The Thing that Pisses Me Off Most About My Job

By Julia Kristina|2017-05-21T16:05:43-07:00June 16th, 2016|General|

I’ve been a therapist for 6 years now. Whoa, 6 years? How did that happen?? And I have to tell you that in the 6 years of doing this work and from the hundreds of men and women I have worked with I have come across 3 people whom I did not enjoy working with. One was a sociopath and was unable to connect with his emotions making it very difficult to make any progress in our work (needless to say, that counselling relationship did not last long). One was a women who [...]

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Stop Trying To Be So Nice. It’s Making You Miserable.

By Julia Kristina|2017-05-21T16:05:44-07:00February 4th, 2016|General|

By nice, I mean trying so hard to always be pleasant, pleasing, lovely, happy, positive, only doing what other people want you to do, never speaking up for fear of ruffling any feathers, keeping yourself hidden and small behind what you think other people want or expect you of you… nice. Don’t get me wrong, I am a big advocate for treating others with kindness, care, and respect. Be considerate and thoughtful, yes. Only doing or saying or acting in ways we think other people want us to because we want, no we NEED them [...]

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How to Keep Yourself From Ever Being Disappointed.

By Julia Kristina|2017-05-21T16:05:44-07:00January 10th, 2016|General|

Ever been disappointed? THAT was a dumb question. So, as you know, it feels awful. And I’m going to go as far as to say that deep disappointment is probably one of the worst feelings ever. But not to worry, right here, right now, I’m going to tell you what you need to do to never feel disappointed again. You must never try anything new, do anything daring, take any risks, pursue any of your dreams, go for any of your big goals, or start any new relationships. On second thought, just to be sure, [...]

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In A Pickle.

By Julia Kristina|2017-05-21T16:05:57-07:00October 9th, 2012|General|

The difference between guilt and shame is as simple as “I did something bad” versus “I am something bad.” Now here’s the interesting part: those individuals who have a sense of worthiness, of love, and of belonging, versus those who are always wondering if they’re good enough, are not those who have things like beauty, social status, wealth, rank in corporate hierarchy, or are living in the most beautiful cities in the world, in fact, what separates those who have a strong sense of love and belonging and the people who really struggle for it [...]

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Risky Business.

By Julia Kristina|2017-05-21T16:06:00-07:00May 7th, 2012|General|

Contrary to popular belief, vulnerability is not, nor is it a sign of, weakness. If we think about it, most of us would agree that it takes a whole lot of courage to be vulnerable, so it could be said that courage and weakness are actually near opposites. Being vulnerable is a risk. It means being exposed and being honest, and the outcome is often uncertain. However, vulnerability is the birthplace of change. It’s really hard to explore ourselves and experience growth within ourselves and within our relationships with others if we’re not willing to [...]

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Taming the Beast.

By Julia Kristina|2017-05-21T16:06:04-07:00September 11th, 2011|General|

Anger is quite a powerful little 5 letter word that means very different things to different people. For some it is an emotion that is rejected or avoided at all cost and understood as evil, bad, or unacceptable. For others it is all too present and readily available to use to hurt, damage, or destroy – sometimes irreparably so. Anger, like most emotions, is not a bad or shameful emotion in and of itself. It can even be very appropriate and useful at times. Without anger as a motivator for action we might feel less compelled to fight [...]

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