acceptance | Julia Kristina Counselling

It’s More Important to Listen than to Give Advice.

By Julia Kristina|2017-05-21T16:05:52-07:00January 15th, 2015|General|

When is the best time to give advice? And the answer is… never. And by never, I mean not ever. Unless, of course, we specifically ask the person if they are looking for our thoughts or suggestions regarding their troublesome situation, AND they reply “yes!” or they explicitly request our advice (but even then the person rarely actually wants your advice – they just want you to fix their problem for them which, of course, none of us can actually do). You see, many of us believe in earnest that we are the experts on [...]

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Who Says? and Who Cares?

By Julia Kristina|2017-05-21T16:05:54-07:00July 17th, 2014|General|

I find it curious when people talk about how they feel bad because they think they should be more interesting by being more interested in something that’s “cool” (I’m not really sure who’s the official word on what’s cool and what’s not, but anyway…) Let’s look at this. Feeling crummy about yourself because you think you should be more interested in x, y, or z in order to make yourself more interesting. But what happens if you’re NOT actually really all that interested in x, y, or z? Some of the ones I've heard are: [...]

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When a Prickle’s Just a Prickle.

By Julia Kristina|2017-05-21T16:05:56-07:00December 4th, 2012|General|

I’ve talked about this before, but I’m going to talk about it some more. One of the most effective antidotes to a crummy mood is to intentionally turn ones thoughts of woe into thoughts of gratitude. We call this developing an “Attitude of Gratitude.” How catchy. Anyway, I realize I make it sound so simple. That said it is usually much easier to reflect on that which we are grateful for when we are feeling good, and not too too difficult when we are feeling mildly blue. However, NOT so easy when we are feeling [...]

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The Wisdom to Know the Difference.

By Julia Kristina|2017-05-21T16:06:02-07:00December 29th, 2011|General|

Today I developed a new appreciation for bus drivers. Perhaps it was because during my short 15 minute bus commute to work I saw my bus driver be the direct receiver of other people’s stress and frustration 3 times. Just a guy, doing his job, and doing it well – and all the while being blamed, targeted, held responsible, and insulted for literally doing nothing wrong. I don’t know about you, but I sure couldn’t do that job. All this to say I imagine bus drivers and other individuals in those types of customer service [...]

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