Having needs and wanting others to meet some of those needs doesn't make you needy. There is a line between being a more healthy amount of needy, and when your needs can be too much for another person to meet. Here, I teach you how to know if you're too needy - and what to do if your neediness is becoming problematic in your most important relationships.
Gaslighting is a hot topic these days because it's a subtle but harmful type of emotional or psychological manipulation that is happening to many more among us than we realize. In the past few videos, we have been talking about what gaslighting is and how to know if you have been a victim of gaslighting. So today, we are going to talk about how to deal with the gaslighter and set very clear boundaries when you are being gaslit.
Feeling rejected by someone you want to be close with hurts. But what happens when you think you're being rejected by someone, but they are actually not truly rejecting you - and you're just jumping to conclusions without hard evidence? Here's how to cope with feeling rejected when it's just based on an assumption rather than facts.
Do you feel like it's all on you to make sure everyone around you is happy, has their needs met and is taken care of all the time? Do you feel good about it or is it stressing you out, is it getting way too overwhelming or are you feeling taken advantage of? I will tell you something, just this time: Stop being so nice! (It's actually making you miserable). The idea of making everybody else happy all the time and meeting all their needs may sound lovely, but the truth is, it’s causing [...]
Guilt is a helpful emotion when it's used to deter us from doing something hurtful or harmful to someone else. But it's not a useful emotion when we use guilt to make ourselves feel badly for something we've done that isn't bad. But, we all do it. We all feel guilty for at least a few things that we don't need to feel guilty for, and here are the 13 most common ones.
Ever have a hard time getting what you want because you don't know how to say what you want, think, need or feel? Is it because you worry about putting someone off, offending them, or coming across as demanding, overly needy or selfish? It's not always easy to speak up or stand up for ourselves and can often feel really nerve wracking or uncomfortable... But not speaking up, not being assertive, and not expressing your wants, needs and preferences when it’s about something that's important to you is taking a toll on your happiness and [...]
We all go through times when we don't feel good enough. When we wonder if we're lovable enough, valuable enough and worthy enough. We all struggle with our self-esteem in this way at least from time to time. Here are several things to remember when you don't feel good enough - and the more you remind yourself of them, the better you're going to feel about yourself and the more your self-confidence will grow.
Not feeling good enough, loveable enough, worthy enough - i.e. Shame - is something we all struggle with at least sometimes. And when we experience shame it can be very debilitating and it can also cause us to act out in unhelpful ways - and that can sabotage our goals, dreams and/or relationships that can make us feel even more shame. Here I teach you 3 life changing ways to move through shame that you can start using today.
Have you heard of mindfulness? I’m sure you have. Apparently it’s all the rage right now. But not because it's something new, mindfulness has been around for a long time - it’s just becoming well-known in the Western World because of all the research that's been done showing how it actually has the power to change our brains from a stressed and anxious one to a more calm and grounded one overall. In this episode of Good For Me TV, I teach you one of the most simple, straight-forward mindfulness exercises that you can do [...]
Shame is something all humans deal with - but few of us like to admit it. Not feeling good enough or feeling like there's something fundamentally wrong with you - at least sometimes - happens to everyone. Here I teach how to use emotional intelligence three different ways to start healing from shame.
Being grateful - it's not a bad thing, in fact it's an incredible thing! And when done properly can even be life changing. But the way we're typically told to practice gratitude has been shown in the research to not actually be effective for most people. In this episode of Good For Me TV, I’m going to tell why this is and what you can be doing instead that does work a whole lot better (without any extra effort).
Guilt from our past can sit in the back of our brains and cause us all kinds of unnecessary pain and discomfort, and it's really hard to let go of guilt when we don't know how to. Here I teach about how to let go of guilt from something you did in your past, and also from something you didn't overtly do, but are still feeling guilty about it.
Overcoming a fear or phobia can be scary and challenging - especially when you haven't been taught the proper way to do it. Here I teach you a CBT skill for how to deal with a fear or phobia that is getting in your way, creating a lot of anxiety or holding you back, so you can do what you want or need to do without feeling anxious.
Having the strong urge to control other people is something many people struggle with and is rooted in either fear or anxiety. Being too controlling can have a negative impact on both your own mental health and on the health of your relationships. You may not realize the things you're doing regularly are an attempt to control others, so we're going to talk about theme here today because when awareness is the first step toward positive change.
Ever wish certain things didn't bother you as much as they do? Do you ever envy other people who seem to be able to take whatever life has for them and not get too bothered about it either way? Ever wonder what it takes to not be so affected by criticism, failure, hardship or struggle? In this episode of Good For Me TV, we're going to talk about 3 simple, but powerful ways we can build more mental toughness.
We all get triggered. It doesn’t matter how emotionally intelligent or emotionally mature you are, there are times that things get under our skin, get our blood boiling, or just make us plain angry. And contrary to popular belief, anger is neither a bad or good emotion - like all others, it's just an emotion. But it’s how we deal with our anger and how we respond to it that can be used for good or evil. In this episode of Good For Me TV today, we're going to talk about 5 ways that emotionally [...]
It can be tempting to think that we need people to agree with our choices - even if those choices have no impact on those with whom we are seeking approval. The question is, why do you think you need to justify your decisions and get their approval? Could it be okay for someone else to not agree with our approve of your choices? Here, we dive deeper into this topic.
All of us are going through life with certain perspectives, ideas or stories about the way things are - or at least the way we think they are We all have 'truths' that govern our lives, but sometimes these truths are not actually very true at all, and can even become unhealthy, unhelpful, unserving and unproductive ways of seeing ourselves, others and the world. In this episode of Good For Me TV, we're going to talk about 5 powerful mindset shifts that may offer you a different way to understand some things that will help [...]
It does NOT feel good to have people walk all over you, take you for granted, take advantage of you or just generally ask a lot and give little to no appreciation. The truth is, you are letting it happen because you don't know why it's happening or how to make it stop. In today's talk I tell you about why people are walking all over you, and what you can do to make it stop
Do you self-sabotage? Do you know what self-sabotage is? The truth is if you're not reaching your goals, having the types of healthy relationships you want or are not where you want to be in life chances are you could be self-sabotaging. In today’s video of Good For Me TV, we are going to talk about what self-sabotage is, what the key signs are that you're doing it, and how to deal with that self-sabotaging behavior if you are.
Do you know those people who seem to be more calm and grounded and happier in general? You might ask yourself, how do they do it? What’s their secret? How can they look so happy and calm? How can I be like them more? You are not alone. We all want to become more calm and happy despite the stress, problems, and anxiety that life can bring. In this episode of Good For Me TV, we are going to talk about the 5 simple things that you can intentionally do right now to become calm, [...]
We are emotional beings who can sometimes be rational so learning how to be emotionally intelligent is going to make our lives much easier. When we are more emotionally intelligent we get better at not getting caught up in any and every "negative" emotion that comes up, and get better at both understanding ourselves and moving through painful, difficult or uncomfortable emotions. In this talk I teach you how.
There are certain things people who are more secure just don’t do. It’s not necessarily because they don’t want to do these things at times, but because they know that even if doing these things might feel good in the moment, the longer-term impact will be unhealthy, detrimental and even have harmful effects on their self-esteem and their sense of self-worth, so they do their best to make a habit of not doing them. In today’s episode of Good For Me TV, we're going to talk about the 5 things that people who are more [...]
One part of the healthy boundary setting process is learning how to set our own boundaries, but it's also about learning how to respect other people's boundaries - which, if you're not used to, can be really difficult at first. Here's what you need to know about other people's boundaries, and how to make sure you are treating their boundaries with respect just as you want them to treat yours the same way.
What is an emotional boundary and why are they so important for our peace, joy and happiness? Here you're going to learn 6 different emotional boundaries and examples on how to set them in different situations so you can feel less stressed, resentful and overwhelmed, and more calm, confident and happy.
This is a simple little trick for shutting down a negative thought. This tool is best used for those unrelenting stubborn negative thoughts that seem to come up when we’re having a moment of vulnerability or a moment of weakness. In this video I teach you this trick of how to stop a negative thought, and the brain science behind how and why it's effective. It's one of my favourites because it's simple and it works.
You may need better boundaries - and I say this because most of us need better, healthier boundaries. Many of our biggest struggles in life are caused by us not setting, and keep our clear, yet kind and firm boundaries. In this talk you'll learn what boundaries you are letting people cross without realizing it, and what to do about it.
There are things you may be apologizing for or feeling guilty about and likely not letting yourself do that are actually causing you a lot of harm. By apologizing for these things you are preventing yourself from living fully and freely. So in today’s episode of Good For Me-TV, we are going to talk about the 3 things you need to stop apologizing for.
We all have thoughts, ideas and beliefs that we have learned throughout our lives that are now holding us back, and keeping us stuck and struggling in our lives. In this talk, I teach you what 10 of these lessons are, and how to start unlearning them now so you can feel happier in your life and have more rich and rewarding relationships with both yourself and others every day.
There are things emotionally strong people do every day. They do these things to meet essential needs that we all have, but they make a point of making sure they respect them. Emotionally strong people know that by making these 4 emotional strength building things non-negotiable they are going to be happier, heartier and more self-loving In this episode of Good For Me-TV, we are going to talk about how to become emotionally strong by using these 4 so you can start making a habit of getting going on them too! *Based in part on [...]