In this talk, we're going to take deeper look at catastrophizing. Catastrophizing is when you either expect the worst to happen, or when an undesirable outcome happens, you think it's the absolute worst. Getting caught by this distorted thinking pattern will leave you feeling anxious, stressed, and can even make you feel depressed or full of self doubt. Sounds lovely, doesn't it? We're going to look more specifically at the two ways is shows up, and then go through the simple steps to overcome it so it can stop hijacking our mood, day or, [...]

 Boundaries are an essential part of the health of your relationship with others and with yourself. You need clear and healthy boundaries in order to feel safe, comfortable and confident. You also need them to break through patterns of overfunctioning, people pleasing, overwhelm and resentment. If you've been trying to set boundaries, but they don't seem to be working the way you expected them to, it's likely because you haven't been setting them in an effective way, and/or sticking to them because you feel guilty. Here we're going to talk about all of that, [...]

 Codependency is really common, and many people are in unhealthy codependent relationships, and maybe don't even know it. Here I talk about what codependency is, where it comes from and why this is an issue for so many people. Before being able to work through unhealthy behaviours, first we need to know what they are and where they come from. Insight first. Then constructive action.

 You have thoughts, you have ideas, you have opinions, you have perspectives and you have preferences. Of course you do, everyone does. But where you're going to need boundaries around them is when somebody comes in and tries to violate or make you feel inferior for yours. These are called intellectual boundaries. You need these boundaries because without them others may continue to try and belittle you or make you feel small simply for having a perspective or an understanding that is different than theirs. What do these intellectual boundary violations look like? And [...]

 Here we talk about what codependency is and I break down the 11 key symptoms to look for in ourselves, or in others. Codependency is one of the most common reasons people struggle to have healthy relationships. It often starts while growing up in a household where one or both parents had an addiction, substance abuse, or mental health issue. If you've even been too worried to speak up with your own wants, needs or preferences in a relationship because you think your partner will not like it and leave you, that's a really [...]

 Material boundaries refer to your limits around your items and possessions like your home, car, clothing, jewelry, furniture, money, etc. It's important to take a moment and reflect on what you will or will not share, and how you expect your items and materials to be treated by the people you share them with. You also get to decide who you share what with. Also having boundaries on how your material items are treated is healthy and prevents resentment in your relationships. It's up to you to communicate where your boundaries are so others [...]

 Struggling and dealing with depression is no joke. It is frustrating, exhausting, and can sometimes feel really hopeless. But what can often happen when we’re trying to figure out how to deal with depression is we end up doing things we think will make us feel better, but are actually making things worse. Many of the symptoms of depression make us want to stay home or in bed or maybe even isolate ourselves all day every day, but that’s just what the mental illness is trying to convince us to do so it can [...]

 Have you ever wondered what it really takes to build self esteem and how to be confident? Why do some people seem to just have all kinds of self confidence, and some really struggle with it? It's tough issue for many, and we often think of it as something you either have or you don't. But the truth is, confidence is something that is built. The only way to get a confidence boost is to make intentional choices that build self confidence. There are little things all of us are doing everyday that cause [...]

 Sexual boundaries are your right to have - even in a consensual sexual relationship. You get to decide what you are and are not comfortable with sexually, what feels good and what doesn't, what you're want and what you don't want, and you get to communicate all of those things anytime. You can also decide you are not comfortable with a sexual act at one point, and then decide later on that you are. You can also say you are okay with a sexual act, and then decide after that you are not. As [...]

 You know those people who you just want to be around? Who draw you in and are just so darn likeable? Sometimes they are popular and charismatic, but not all of them are. Some are really grounded and understated. So the good news is, you don’t have to be the life of the party, or be the biggest extrovert or have an outgoing personality to have a lot of likeability. In this video I talk about 3 simple habits that naturally draw people close to us and make us magnetic. And the good news [...]

 We often expect others to set our time and energy boundaries for us. We thing they should know how much is too much to ask, what's an appropriate or inappropriate request and what we should or shouldn't be able to do. But if they are different in their capacity for any of these things, they likely wouldn't even know where our boundaries are. In addition, we all also have time and energy boundaries - it's impossible not to have them. The issue is, our boundaries are further out than they need to be so [...]

 Anxiety is one of those challenging things so many people struggle with these days - and the thing that makes it interesting is the typical ways most people try to cope with their anxiety symptoms are the same things that tend to them feel more anxious in the long run, and can even lead to mental illness or a more significant mood disorder. That said, if you are doing any of these, know that you are not doing them on purpose. None of us wants to struggle or suffer unnecessarily - especially when it [...]

 Most people have the wrong idea about boundaries - they think boundaries will make them rigid, difficult or unkind. The exact opposite is true if you have HEALTHY ones. Healthy boundaries preserve and protect us and our relationships. Without them we can get into relationship dynamics of feeling resentful, angry, violated or unsafe. Because so few of us understand what boundaries actually are, we rarely see them working well. But when they do, it makes all the difference to your mental health and the health of your relationships. There are 6 types of boundaries [...]

 People have the wrong idea about boundaries - they think boundaries will make them rigid, difficult or unkind. The exact opposite is true if you have HEALTHY ones. Healthy boundaries preserve and protect us and our relationships. Without them we can get into relationship dynamics of feeling resentful, angry, violated or unsafe. Because so few of us understand what boundaries actually are, we rarely see them working well. But when they do, it makes all the difference in your mental health and the health of your relationships. There are 6 types of boundaries you [...]

 Why are we so hard on ourselves? Why do so many of us get stuck in self criticism and negative self talk? Do we think that if we are hard enough on ourselves for any misstep, failure or imperfection that it will miraculously cause us to have better self esteem and self confidence? But the thing is, most of us don’t even realize how dangerous our critical self talk is. In fact, it can make our mental health struggles with anxiety and depression a whole lot worse, not to mention the extra pressure and [...]

 Confidence is something most of us want at least a little more of, but it can be hard to know exactly how to build that confidence in a deep, meaningful and lasting way. Here I teach you 5 simple tweaks to how you are thinking and showing up everyday that will help you become immediately more confident. And the good news is, some of them are actually really fun. Deep lasting confidence isn't something only other people can have - it's something you can build too, and these 5 tweaks will get you well [...]

 Who do you want to become? How do you want to transform yourself? Who do you need to be? These are just a few of the messages that sound positive on the outside, but in reality are damaging our self esteem, our self confidence, and our sense of self worth. And do you know why this is? It’s because of their implied message of shame. What they are saying is who you are now is not good enough. That you can’t be yourself and feel good about it. That how to build self confidence [...]

Feeling comfortable with yourself and confident in who you are is not always easy. It's all to easy to get stuck in thinking that we're not good enough in some way, or think other people are thinking negative things about us, or even, truly believe that we're fundamentally flawed in some way, and the only way to feel comfortable with ourselves is to become something or someone else. But the truth is, becoming more comfortable with yourself is not about changing who you are, it's about accepting who you are from the inside out. Here [...]

 What is Mindfulness? Is it all about doing mindfulness meditations and mindfulness exercises? Or is it a way of being. A general attitude or outlook on life? And the answer is YES! It is both. Being mindful is just a fancy way of saying being present. And because most of us don’t spend much time actually being present, or brains don't always know how to do it on their own, which is why we have to practice it by being intentionally more mindful. In essence, mindfulness teaches us to slow down our brain, to [...]

 Do you often feel like people zone out or seem completely uninterested in what you're saying? Do you often feel like you're not really being listened to? Are you confused why people ignore you so much? But what if it's because of something you may be doing? Having good and healthy relationships where we feel valued, seen and heard does contribute a great deal to our happiness, but when we're being ignored too much it has both a negative impact on our relationships, and on how we think and feel about ourselves. This is [...]

 Do you ever feel really anxious or full of panic? And have you noticed that the harder you try to tell yourself to stop getting so worked up and just calm down, the more upset, anxious or panicked you get? Well, there's a good reason for that (and no, it's not because you're messed up or broken). It's because when you are feeling really anxious your brain is in fight or flight mode. You are literally getting ready to handle a potentially threatening situation and your brain and body are going into a visceral [...]

 Resentment can be a tough one because more often than not, the person we are bitter and resentful toward has no idea we resent them, but it causes us a lot of unnecessary pain and suffering. We usually feel resentment when someone is not meeting an expectation we have, or is not giving us the amount of consideration, care or attention that we expect them to. So what do we do? Have zero expectations ever so no one can disappoint us and we never be bitter or resentful? No, that's not the answer either, [...]

 Chronic stress is on the rise - with one report saying that 50% of Americans believe they will never feel stress free ever again. So, why is it that people are more stressed out than ever, and what are the main things people are stressed about? Is there anything we can do to reduce stress and feel stress free again? The answer is yes! And it this talk I'm going to share with you the 4 things that are causing you the most stress and a robust list of things you can start doing [...]

 You know those times when you are feeling emotionally all out of sorts and can’t figure out why? You feel like you could easily fall apart at the drop of a pin or bite the next person's head off who looks at you sideways, but you can't think of what happened to cause your emotions to be right up at the surface and ready to spill right over. Well, there may be very good reason for you to be feeling this way. Actually there may be 1 of 5 good reasons for you to [...]

 If you are deep in difficult feelings right now, but nothing you are doing is helping you feel better, this is an exercise for you. It will not make you feel immediately amazing, but it will create radical acceptance about what you are going through, and ease the suffering caused by either resisting what you are feeling, or trying to force yourself through it before you are actually ready.

 When talking about to the kind of anxiety that is rooted in our anxiety provoking thoughts, this type of anxiety comes about because of 2 things coming together - an Anxiety Equation, if you will. You must experience both of these things in order to feel anxious. In this video, I talk about what these 2 parts of the Anxiety Equation are, and what we can do to start intervening and turning them around so that we can cope with anxiety and feel less anxious. And the best part is, we only really have [...]

 Have you ever felt like you missed the day in school where they were teaching people how be awesome at life? Where they taught how to handle whatever life had for you with grace and ease? Or maybe you felt like you missed the day in school where they were teaching people how to be comfortable and confident with themselves no matter what. I'm guessing it sometimes feels like everyone else has it all figured out, and you're left on the sidelines wondering how you missed out. Have you ever felt emotionally out of [...]

 Fidget spinners --- they are all the rage right now. But what are fidget spinners anyway? Maybe you know all about them, or maybe you’ve recently heard about them for the first time and want to know more. Did you know that fidget spinners help with anxiety and with stress also? But how do fidget spinners help with anxiety and stress you might be wondering? Well, there are actually 2 major, research proven ways the help: they can be helpful for people who tend to be more jittery and fidgety when they are feeling [...]

 If you ever get stuck in overthinking a situation or struggling with intrusive thoughts this video is going to help you create space between you and your thoughts using the skill of cognitive diffusion. Using this skill is going to allow you to see beyond your thoughts instead of getting stuck in whichever one happens to pop into your brain. Intrusive thoughts can be confusing, disturbing or painful and they can make you think there's something deeply wrong with you or that you are losing your mind - but neither of those things are [...]

 Often, when we are feeling triggered by something we immediately start to feel really worked up, ramped up, or keyed up and often can’t think clearly or access the rational thoughts that would help get us through the upsetting situation in a calm, balanced and reasonable way. So what do we do? Before we have any hope of getting through the emotional sh*t storm with as much integrity and as little shame or guilt as possible, it's important we first take a few minutes to do something simple, yet productive to take the emotional [...]